In the first video, we explored how to speak to each attachment style with your clients. In this video, we’ll look at some ways to help your clients move forward in time. Trauma stops time, and when clients have a trauma history, they may carry fears associated with the traumatic event for years after—as if they’re experiencing the event all over again.

I’ll show you how to use effective language to help your client step through time so they can live more in the present and move beyond their fears. I’ll give you some examples of clients who have benefited from this approach so you can assist your own clients in a similar process.

I greatly enjoyed making these videos for you and appreciate your questions and feedback. Please comment below.

Warmly,

Diane

24 Comments

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  2. Kathryn Fearnley January 31, 2015 at 2:07 pm

    I would like to be on your mailing list if possible. I am an SRT student, and half my office is doing SE…so I would love to receive the video’s if possible.

    Thank you very much,
    Kathryn

  3. Thressa Newell January 27, 2015 at 7:39 pm

    Thank you so much. Your very specific and concrete language is what I so much desire to learn, or if not learn each time, to compare with my own to discover if I’m doing what needs to be done for my client. So often my client gets better, but I never know whether I’m honing my language to my client’s needs or if he/she just gets better because I’m there supporting them and nodding my head. These nitty gritty videos both teach and validate me. Thank you.

  4. Toos Graaff January 25, 2015 at 11:59 am

    Dear Diana, I was with you in a training in Holland, which I enjoyed very much, and it is nice to see you so enthousiastic as I remembered you with your enormous knowledge about trauma. From this video I take the amount of time to spend on T +….., I think I am sometimes to quick, and the expanding of the resources, also the resource of feeling safe after the impact of the trauma. So thank you very much, for sharing this, warm greetings Toos Graaff

  5. elizabeth reed-krul January 23, 2015 at 7:07 am

    Dear Diane, Thank you for yet another great video.
    it is a delight to hear how much you weave in a small space. It is so practical and sooo good to hear it over and over again.

    Your words and work give hope, direction and a lot of insight and make me smile.

    with love, Elizabeth (The netherlands)

  6. Senicourt, Icki January 22, 2015 at 11:32 am

    Dear Diane,

    I loooooooove these short videos and your way to explain, so very clear !

    I actually work with a client who very probably got abused by father very early (around 2 or 3 years age )
    She has NOOOOOOO memory at all, but the suspicion started to come to the surface when one day she suddenly got a panic attack seeing her husband ejaculating;
    She can not see him naked or smell the smell of sperma;
    Would you go to THAT later memory ?? She is VERY anxious , one part wants to get rid of it ( they are a very good couple , loving husband , sweet children ) the
    other “postpones” the work on father since months …
    Thank you so much for your warm and smiling self
    hugs from Paris
    icki senicourt

  7. Janae Munday, LCSW January 22, 2015 at 9:16 am

    Diane,
    Thank-you so very much for putting these very informative videos together! I really like the way you are helping us put the theory of attachment into practical applications in the therapy session. It is one thing to read and learn about a theory, it is quit another thing to identify as it is happening in the therapy session and then know how to implement it’s interventions!

    I have been listening to some of Besel Ven Der Kolk’s lectures on trauma and how it effects our bodies so your therapeutic exercises are a perfect fit.

    Thank-you!

  8. Diane Heller January 21, 2015 at 3:45 pm

    My privilege and pleasure! Thanks so much, Sharon.

  9. Dawn W. January 21, 2015 at 9:04 am

    Thank you for these videos, Diane!

  10. Sharon J. January 21, 2015 at 3:34 am

    Thank you again Diane for being so generous with both your knowledge and time.
    It is greatly appreciated.
    Sharon J.

  11. Jeanette, LCSW, USA January 21, 2015 at 12:53 am

    Thank you so much – you are a great therapist and teacher. I look forward to learning more!

  12. Cathy Latner, LCSW, SEP January 20, 2015 at 11:23 am

    Diane, again, such an elegant, articulate and helpful video from you. I love
    the client examples and your highly skillful use of language and imagery.

    Thank you for all you so generously offer to the healing community.

    • Diane Heller January 21, 2015 at 3:43 pm

      Hey Cathy – great to hear from you!

      Thank you for your sweet comments. Happy to spread some insights that might help us help our clients and ourselves.

      So Glad you found this info useful!

      Have a great winter.

      Warmly – (in the middle of a snowstorm in CO),

      Diane

  13. Elena January 19, 2015 at 5:30 pm

    Thank you Diane. Do you know how wonderful you are–doing this work…where few women seem to tread!? Too many boundary-busting men have taken the lime-light and call themselves authorities, but society too often leaves women in the dust in this profession. Kudos to you…is my point.

    Q: Do you try to pick off the NEWEST iteration of a recapitulating
    trauma FIRST…or do you attempt to go back to the ORIGINAL trauma even when it happened as an *IMPLICIT* memory? Do you use hypnotic regression to take clients back to T-zero?

    • Diane Heller January 21, 2015 at 3:41 pm

      Dear Elena, Great questions.

      I am not schooled in hypnosis so I don’t use it the traditional way at all – rather I visit the younger selves as they present themselves “organically” – I guess I could say as they are willing to arise. I am sure in some cases hypnosis as Erickson and my good friend, Bill O’Hanlon practices it would also be very helpful as I believe the client and their awareness is included in the process more actively.

      There is no rule and we all need to trust our perceptions about where the client is resourced enough to start a process. Generally, but not always, I try to get to the most original trauma available to the client’s awareness since it may be the main push behind trauma re-enactment. I interview the younger self and try to meet the unmet needs. So it is not just excavating pain but bringing trust, understanding, safety and relief as well. I try to help that part hav or find it’s voice with me or with the adult self of the client intra-psychically.

      Sometimes I work a later event and older age if the trauma is so early that the person is too overwhelmingly helpless to build resources and a sense of success first.

      Thank you and your cilents are lucky to have you!

      Warmly, diane

  14. Lydia Denton January 19, 2015 at 5:08 pm

    So clear and helpful! Thank you, Lydia

  15. Anne Clément January 19, 2015 at 4:09 pm

    Thank you for this video so generously provided, it is really clear and efficient on how to integrate the body and the event’sequences soi t is possible to move forward in time. It gives me precious tools to follow my path.

    Anne

    • Diane Heller January 21, 2015 at 3:32 pm

      Dear Anne, Yes, if we can all gradually bring our past more healed – into the light of the present – very powerful practice! My best to you and thanks so much for your thoughtful comment.
      Warmly, diane

  16. Louise January 19, 2015 at 2:51 pm

    Thanks again Diane. These concise, little nuggets are so helpful in terms of assisting me to bring theory into my clinical work with clients. The languaging piece is what assists me to integrate what I understand through trainings into the organic flow with in session with the client. I’m looking forward to more.

    • Diane Heller January 21, 2015 at 3:30 pm

      “Languaging” is such a big deal in a way, isn’t it? I find it helpful to really think about every word we use and the energy that accompanies the words as well.
      Thank you for your kind comment, Louise!

      Warmly,
      diane

  17. Eva Cohaus January 19, 2015 at 10:06 am

    So hands-on, thank you Diane. Great as always!
    Hugs, Eva

    • Diane Heller January 21, 2015 at 3:27 pm

      Dear Eva – thank you for your kind words! Great to connect.
      Warmly diane

  18. Christa Flowers January 19, 2015 at 8:49 am

    I really get a better understanding of what you specialize in attachment styles, and trauma therapy by watching your videos. It gives me a few idea’s of what to look for in a therapist when I can afford financially and ready to be detraumatized

    • Diane Heller January 21, 2015 at 3:27 pm

      I am so happy to hear that you find this potentially helpful in your healing process. My best to you on your healing journey! Warmly diane

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