May is time to celebrate Mother’s Day. Take a moment to reflect on your relationship with your mother. Sometimes our relationships with our mothers are challenging, but we can look at what or who provided a loving, nurturing and mothering presence. Even a male person, like a father or brother, can have a mothering presence. See if you can take that in and absorb the loving-kindness, words, and gestures to build your capacity to take that in.

I had a challenging relationship with my mom, and just a few years ago, I began to think of the little things she did for me – having soup for me after school, running errands with me, and helping me shop for clothes. My mom loved to celebrate holidays and birthdays and always made those a special occasion. Some of it was challenging, but I decided to focus on taking in the positive gestures to repair.

I also had a beautiful, mothering relationship with my first spiritual teacher. She helped me heal a lot of my wounds around being mothered. Everyone felt like she was their ideal mom. You really felt like you were in an ocean of love in her presence. So see if you can find those experiences of mothering or mothering presence and take that in.


Dr. Diane Poole Heller