The Brain’s Negativity Bias and Its Influence on Secure Attachment

Because human brains prioritize survival – fight, flight, and freeze responses play a role in our daily lives, which can impact our ability to develop Secure Attachment both as children and as adults. Negative or threatening experiences register quickly into our long-term memories due to the ever-vigilant amygdala. The amygdala is responsible for our survival responses [...]

5 Reasons Why Attachment Matters for Therapists

While each person is different, those with Attachment injury may embody certain challenges. Avoidant, Ambivalent, Disorganized, and Secure Attachment likely have different histories and work with relationship differently in their adult lives. Healthy, Secure Attachment is within reach. Gaining in-depth knowledge about working with each Attachment styles can elevate your private practice and your personal life. [...]

What Is the Greatest Secret to Relationship Success?

Have you ever wondered how some people seem to have the best relationships while you and your partner keep having the same arguments over and over? Do you wish to be completely understood and to deeply satisfy yourself and your partner emotionally? Do you love your partner but often feel like you are not as connected [...]

Valentine’s Day Video – Deepening Intimacy

Happy Valentine's Day! You can celebrate deepening intimacy and connection with your partner, children, colleagues, and friends on a deep level and learn how to sustain those important relationships in your life. Norman Doidge, MD, says the brain loves novelty and that this novelty is part of keeping romance and interest alive. I hope you find [...]

Happy Valentine’s Day from Diane Poole Heller

Happy Valentine's Day! I hope you enjoy this video. Valentine's Day is a celebration of our capacity to love. To ensure you're getting and giving the greatest gourmet contact nutrition on this special day, remember: Be conscious of your voice: Choose and use a melodic and soothing voice. Incorporate touch: Touch is the way we communicate [...]

The Power of Prosody: Tone of Voice & the Attachment System

Tone of voice, or prosody, is a huge part of how your Attachment system works. Tone of voice can trigger the amygdala immediately — it’s designed to be an instant danger signal. What happens in women's voices when they get activated or they see danger? They get shrill. That’s like a siren call back to tribal [...]

Video 5: Disorganized Attachment In Couples

In the last video, we talked about disorganized attachment in individuals. This time I'll answer your questions about dealing with couples when both partners have a disorganized attachment pattern. This final video will cover topics including: 1) How disorganized attachment develops 2) Down-regulating yourself and your partner 3) Spending individual time with each partner in a [...]

Avoidant: Kind Eyes Exercise

Imagine you are looking out into the world and seeing kind eyes looking back at you. Perhaps you remember a time you showed up unexpected at a friend’s door, and they opened the door truly delighted to see YOU! What happens in and around your eyes, your body, your emotional state? This guy, the Dalai Lama, has been [...]

Go to Top